Family favoritism extends to estate

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amy dickinson

Dear Amy: My husband and I have four adult children, all in college. I am the main breadwinner as a professional and business owner. My husband makes one-third of my income.

My husband’s brother has made mistakes in his life, the main one being to marry an unstable, unpredictable, and irresponsible woman.

She alienated him from the rest of us and was very unkind to me, specifically.

They have one daughter, “Kristen.” (She has other children she doesn’t see and didn’t raise.) She does not work and spends selfishly and lavishly.

My mother-in-law has always favored Kristen, but is a wonderful presence for all of her grandchildren.

My mother-in-law now wants to transfer the family vacation cottage to my husband, while leaving the rest of her estate to his brother.

This transfer will cost us hundreds of thousands of dollars in fees and taxes.

We have agreed to take this on to keep the cottage in the family. We have been managing and investing in its improvements for the last few years. Our children enjoy it.

The catch is that my mother-in-law wants us to also give her significant monies to fund Kristen’s education.

Without this money, she is threatening to sell the cottage.

This means her estate will go to the brother. Nothing will be left for our children.



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